Kicking off the stress of holidays.

While the holidays are supposed to be filled with love, fun and laughter it’s not so jolly for everyone.

Believe it’s or not this time of year is a trigger for some. Especially those who may battle depression, loss of love one, empty nesters, mothers who’ve experienced miscarriages, maybe you’ve moved clear across the country from your family and visiting during the holidays are scarce.

I battled depression for years and quite frankly after my first marriage holidays were like “blah”.. the thrill and excitement had escaped me as I journeyed through finding me and my purpose. Like, I was a Scrooge lol. Can I be honest? At the time I didn’t want to scroll social media. I didn’t want to see happy families in matching pj’s for Christmas. I didn’t want see the Thanksgiving spreads and family game night pics. I wanted to sit in my dark room and bask in my misery. Whew, it was bad. Thank God for deliverance ❤️!

While I don’t suffer from depression any longer being away from my family during the Holidays I find myself missing them a bit more during this season. Can you imagine being a momma’s girl and NEVER being away from your parents and one day packing up your life and starting a new life 1300 miles away from what was once home. Please, don’t get me wrong. I love my new family here and enjoy creating new memories with my husband and children but there is no place like “home”. So, to fulfill my hunger of missing them I make extra phone calls, FaceTime (thank God for technology), and the girls even write letters and homemade cards when we can’t travel.

So, today I pray for those who need a little push to find the joy again during the holiday season. I pray for that single mom who may boggled from the stress of how to make ends meet during a pandemic and maintain a level of happiness for her children. I pray for that new wife who’s moved to start a new life and may not have the resources to visit her family. I pray for the mom who’s kids are away at college and her children may not be able to return home this year. I pray for the woman who’s having complications carrying a child and the holidays may be a trigger for her. God, give us joy unspeakable that only comes from you. Amen.

Here are a few tips to help;

1. Plan ahead and reach out.

If this is your first holiday away from your family or in a new city, make plans in advance. Reach out to the people you know and see if you can make plans to see a movie or go to dinner together. You don’t have to wait for someone else to invite you. Plan in advance and get a few things on the calendar so you have something to look forward to.

2. Plan for difficult days.

If there are days that you think may be especially difficult for you because of a recent loss or other association, be sure you have an activity planned for that day, or at least a planned “check in” with a friend or relative by phone, facetime or skype.

3. Research group holiday activities.

If you are a member of a group or organization, find out what holiday activities they have planned and join in. Sign up for the potluck, the holiday cookie swap, or tacky sweater leg day at the gym.


4. Join a new group.

If you’re not a member of a group, find one in your area or a church that’s identify a faith community with social opportunities.


5. Volunteer to help others.

Another way to combat loneliness during the holidays is to volunteer in the community. match individuals and groups with local nonprofits to meet needs and build community.



6. Know how to ask for help in a crisis.

Especially for people who experience depression or anxiety, isolation can lead to depression or heightened it.

Don’t Give In to Holiday Pressures

  1. Feel free to leave an event if you aren’t comfortable. Be willing to tell others, “I’m not up for this right now.”

But whatever you do don’t allow the weight of you’re carrying allow you not to make memories and be grateful of the ones who are around you and have your best interest at heart.

I’m a lover of blogs and bloggers. Truly blogs have offered me so many great ideas, a comforting reassurance that I’m not “alone” in this mothering journey, and a source of community over the past years.

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